James E. Ryan Quotes

Asking good questions is hard because it requires you to see past the easy answers and to focus instead on the difficult, the tricky, the mysterious, the awkward, and sometimes the painful. But

All of which is to say that how you help matters just as much as that you do help, which is why it is essential to begin by asking, “How can I help?” If you start with this question, you are asking, with humility, for direction. You are recognizing that others are experts in their own lives, and you are affording them the opportunity to remain in charge, even if you are providing some help.

quick word, finally, about being a good listener. It is useful as a listener to be on the lookout for versions of the “Wait, what?” question. Some things you say will inevitably provoke opposition or challenge from friends, family members, or colleagues. It is easy, when on the receiving end of these challenges, to immediately begin an argument, trying to defend your position. But you might try to remember that the person posing the challenge or expressing opposition could simply be in need of further explanation or may just need to better understand the rationale or motivation behind what you are saying.

Because you were my first friend here. You listened to me.

But I think it’s crucial because it reminds you (and others) to slow down to make sure you truly understand. Too often we fail to pause for clarification, thinking that we understand something before we do. In doing so, we miss the opportunity to grasp the full significance of an idea, an assertion, or an event. Asking “Wait, what?” is a good way to capture, rather than miss, those opportunities

Asking good questions is hard because it requires you to see past the easy answers and to focus instead on the difficult, the tricky, the mysterious, the awkward, and sometimes the painful.

The important thing,” he observed, “is to not stop questioning. Never lose a holy curiosity.” Curiosity begins with asking “I wonder why?

When like-minded individuals get together, online or in real life, they tend to reinforce each other’s views. They not only increase the strength of each other’s convictions, but they often lead each other, intentionally or not, to take even more extreme positions.

Couldn’t we at least . . . ?” is a good way to get unstuck. It is a way to get past disagreement to form some consensus, as in, “Couldn’t we at least agree?” It’s also a way to get started even when you’re not entirely sure where you will finish, as in: “Couldn’t we at least begin?” No matter its specific form, asking questions that begin with “Couldn’t we at least . . . ?” is the way to make progress.

The explosion of information fueled by the internet and social media should in theory help bring us into contact and engagement with ideas, facts, and beliefs that challenge our own, which in turn should help us moderate our views and keep an open mind. In reality, the opposite is happening.

The simple truth is that an answer can only be as good as the question asked. If you ask the wrong question, you are going to get the wrong answer.

there is no greater gift to bestow on children than the gift of curiosity.

While the question “I wonder if?” is a question worth asking on its own, it is also closely connected to the question “I wonder why?” Once you start asking “I wonder why?” and especially if you get an unsatisfying answer, you are inevitably going to ask “I wonder if things could be different?” Put another way, to ask “I wonder why?” about the present naturally raises the question “I wonder if?” about the future.

More than any of his colleagues, Justice Stevens tended to break open the case by asking lawyers the question at the center of their case, one they had to answer successfully in order to prevail.

.” It takes time to discover the question, but it is time well spent. Einstein, who was a big believer in the importance of asking questions, famously said that if he had an hour to solve a problem, and his life depended on it, he would spend the first fifty-five minutes determining the proper question to ask.