That would be a good public service announcement for Nickelodeon: "Hi, this is Bob Saget. Don't f*ck that sh*t. Stay in school. And read!" - Bob Saget

In my career I've had the fortune of being able to work continually in radically diverse creative worlds. By day I've done some of the most family-friendly TV imaginable. Then, often in the same day, I've gone onstage in the L.A. comedy clubs and whirled off with an adolescent's delight about my grandma's projectile diarrhea. That in itself could, by many psychiatrists' standards, be a bit of a call for help. I never do it to shock anyone, even though people have sometimes thought of me as a shock comic. If it is a through-line or a constant to what I do, it's not something I'm proud of. But I'm not ashamed of it either. It's more of a handicap. Or, depending on your perspective, a gift. It's what I used to think of as my mania. Now I've come to embrace it. You have to love yourself. But not in a movie theater, because they will tabloid your ass.

If you laugh at that, you lower the bar, and I will limbo under it because I am a f*cked-up guy!

Kids, do not f*ck that sh*t; you'll get an infection.