I enlisted to fight against foreign and domestic enemies. The average protestor on the streets is not an enemy, not a terrorist. That's not the job o… - Nicholas Irving

I've never really talked about this openly. I was too scared and too uncomfortable. Given what's happened recently with the death of George Floyd and the response to that, I've been asked about these issues more. The simple answer is that yes, in the military, I was discriminated against. It wasn't always open, so it was often subtle, but I felt it was there. Some people made assumptions about me just because of the color of my skin.

I've been pulled over multiple times for the same taillight that is not burned out. I've been paid one-third less for television appearances and other work in that industry than my white counterparts with less experience. I've been told by TV people that when I had dreadlocks, I should cut them out because my appearance was sending a negative message. Some of this stuff happened as recently as two weeks ago. So it happens. And as a black man, you take it. Not all the time, but most of the time because you grow up aware of the consequences of not taking it. And recently, as a veteran, I've watched and listened as there's been talk of having our active duty military people being called in to help quiet unrest and arrest lawbreakers. I couldn't imagine doing that. Not to black people. Not to white people.

I look back now, and I'm completely amazed at a lot of things we all did. I was scared every time we went outside the gate. Every single time. Every single firefight. That last deployment in Helmand Province I was convinced I was going to die. Maybe it was superstition, but on your last deployment after you'd made the decision to leave the military, you know that you were either going to get shot or killed. We were experiencing way too much contact with the enemy, way too many ambushes, way too many close calls. At that point, Marjah was the Wild West. The only thing that kept me going was the guys to my left and to my right.