College Lesson Number Two: It's dangerous to step outside of your comfort zone, particularly when mobsters are involved. - Thomas G. Kelley

As I stared at the grass under which my great-grandfather was buried, a single question ran through my mind: Was it worth it? The same question strikes me every time I visit the Vietnam War Memorial in Washington, D.C., that honors the 58,000 who died in one of the longest and most controversial wars in the history of this country. Although 620,000 lives were lost in the Civil War, it brought us the emancipation of slaves and the preservation of the Union. There is no similar weighty statement I can make for the Vietnam War.

Before me stood a Marine recruiting poster come to life. Tall and with an athletic build and a dozen medals pinned to his chest, Marine Corps Major Kelly oozed confidence. Even his firm handshake and the way his eyes locked onto mine conveyed a no-nonsense attitude. I was about to graduate from the College of the Holy Cross, in Worcester, Massachusetts, with an economics degree and no clue how to use it. I was looking for the next step. Several of my classmates who had been in the Navy ROTC program spoke with such reverence about Major Kelly, I was sure they'd stake their lives on his ability to walk on water. One day I bumped into him on campus and decided to introduce myself. My heart skipped a beat as Major Kelly uttered the words that would ultimately change the course of my life. "It's a shame that you couldn't be one of us," he said, referring to my failed attempt to get into the ROTC program due to my poor eyesight. Major Kelly congratulated me on my forthcoming graduation, wished me luck, and disappeared from my life. But his words stayed. They created a picture in my mind of a team that I knew I wanted to be a part of.

There's a tradition in Massachusetts, starting with the North Bridge in Concord, with U.S. history starting here, a history of service. We take care of our own. When you think of John Adams, people like that who just embody service. Abe Lincoln's family was from here, right out near where Tom Hudner lives in Concord. There's a tradition here. The first Vietnam veterans' memorial in the U.S. was built in South Boston in 1982. The towns here seem to have paid more than their proportion in sending sons off to war.