Man is solid, not liquid. But with the fluid nature of networking, my personal brand would grow faster if I would just go with the flow. - Jarod Kintz

The moon is an orbital albino, and it gets tons of sunlight, so I propose Operation Sunscreen, where astronauts coat the surface of the moon with a protective layer of sunscreen. If you care about albinos and the environment, you’ll see this is a good idea. And hey, it’s a better use of taxpayer funds than bailing out private banks.

In a blind taste-test, my kisses were rated as Helen Kelleresque. Women love how the only sense I keenly possess is nonsense.

If I were a mannequin, I'd know people would only want me for my body. But that's OK, because that's how it is now.