But his hits were greater than the sum of his misses, and such is the way with greatness. - Jasper Fforde

"We're fine, Joff. You?"
"Not that good, Thurs. The Church of the Global Standard Deity has undergone a split."
"No!" I said with his much surprise and concern in my voice as I could muster.
"I'm afraid so. The new Global Standard Clockwise Deity have broken away due to unresolvable differences over the direction in which the collection plate is passed round."
"Another split? That's the third this week!"
"Fourth," replied Joffy dourly, "and it's only Tuesday. The Standardized pro-Baptist conjoined Methodarian-Lutherian sisters of something-or-other split into two subgroups yesterday. Soon," he added grimly, "there won't be enough ministers to man the splits."

"Did she believe you?"
"She's an excellent journalist—of course not."

My father said it was a delightfully odd—and dangerously self-destructive—quirk of humans that we were far more interested in pointless trivia then in genuine news stories.