We wanted proper outback: a place where men were men and sheep were nervous. - Bill Bryson

It is not true that the English invented cricket as a way of making all other human endeavours look interesting and lively; that was merely an unintended side effect. I don't wish to denigrate a sport that is enjoyed by millions, some of them awake and facing the right way, but it is an odd game.

Blackpool's illuminations are nothing if not splendid, and they are not splendid.

For forty years or so this was the world headquarters of conspicuous consumption.