The premature development of the sexual inclination is not alone repugnant to all we associate with the term childhood, but is also fraught with danger to dawning manhood. On the judicious treatment of a case such as has been sketched, it probably depends whether the dangerous propensity shall be so kept in check as to preserve the boy’s health and innocence, or whether one more shattered constitution and wounded conscience shall be added to the victims of sexual precocity and careless training. It ought not to be forgotten that in such a cases a quasi-sexual power often accompanies these premature sexual inclinations. Few, perhaps, except medical men, know how early in life a mere infant may experience erections. Frequently it may be noticed that a little child, on being taken out of bed in the morning, cannot make water at once. It would be well if it were recognized by parents and nurses that this often depends upon a more or less complete erection.

Sexual Precocity.-There are two periods in human life when the sexual instincts should be totally dormant; and they are so when nature is not perverted. The first is the period reaching from infancy to puberty. The second is the period reached in advanced age. If raised strictly in accordance with natural law, children would have no sexual notions or feelings before the occurrence of puberty. No prurient speculation about sexual matters would enter their heads. Until that period, the reproductive system should lie dormant in its undeveloped state. No other feeling should be exhibited between the sexes than that brotherly and sisterly affection which is so admirable and becoming. Fortunate, indeed, would it be for humanity if this natural state always existed; but it is a lamentable fact that it is rarely seen in modern homes. Not infrequently, evidences of sexual passion are manifested before the child has hardly learned to walk. It has been suggested that this precocity is nothing remarkable or unnatural, since it is often seen in little lambs and other young animals. To this it is only necessary to reply that the development of the sexual instincts perfectly correspond with the longevity of the animal; if short-lived, like the sheep, only a short period intervenes between birth and the attainment of the sexual appetite and virility. If the animal is intended for long life, as is the case with man, these manifestation s are delayed until a much later period, or should be. Certain insects perform the sexual act as soon as they acquire their perfect form; but they perish as soon as the act is completed.

We again quote from Dr. Acton some observations on the causes of this disorder,-for a grave disorder it is,-as follows:-
”I should specify “hereditary” predisposition as by no means the least common. . . . I believe that, as in body and mind, so also in the passions, the sins of the father are frequently visited on the children. No man or woman, I am sure, can have habitually indulged the sexual passions . . . without , at least, running the risk of finding that a disposition to follow a similar career has been inherited by the offspring. It is in this way only that we can explain the early and apparently almost irresistible propensity in generation after generation indulging similar habits and feelings.”

Flirting is not confined to young men and women. The contagion extends to little boys and girls, whose heads ought to be as empty of all thoughts of sexual relations as the vacuum of an air-pump of air. The intimate association of young boys and girls in our common schools, and, indeed, in the majority of educational institutions, gives abundant opportunity for the fostering of this kind of a spirit, so prejudicial to healthful mental and moral development. Every educator who is alive to the objects and interests of his profession knows too well the baneful influence of these premature and pernicious tendencies. Many times has the teacher watched with a sad heart and withering of all his hopes for the intellectual progress of a naturally gifted scholar by this blighting influence. The most dangerous period for boys and girls exposed to temptations of this sort is just following puberty, or between the ages of twelve and eighteen or twenty. This period, a prominent educator in one of our Western States once denominated, not inappropriately, “the agonizing period of human puppyhood.” If this critical period is once safely passed, the individual is comparatively safe; but how many fail to pass through the ordeal unseared! The most painful phase of this subject is the tacit-even, in many cases, active-encouragement which too many parents give their children in this very direction, seemingly in utter ignorance of the enormity of the evil which they are winking at or fostering Parents need enlightenment on this subject, and need to be aroused to the fact that it is one of the most momentous questions that can arise in the rearing and training of children.

Precocious Sexuality.-The causes of a too early development of sexual peculiarities, as manifested in infantile flirtations and early signs of sexual passion, were dwelt upon quite fully in a previous connection, and we need not repeat them here. Certain it is that few things can be more dangerous to virtue than the premature development of those sentiments which belong only to puberty and later years. It is a most unnatural, but not uncommon, sight to se a girl of tender age evincing all those characters which mark the wanton of older years. “Men’s Lewdness”- It cannot be denied that men are in the greatest degree responsible for the “social evil.” The general principle holds true here as elsewhere that the supply is regulated by the demand. If the patrons of prostitution should withdraw their support by a sudden acquisition of virtue, how soon would this vilest of traffics cease! The inmates of brothels would themselves become continent, if not virtuous, as the result of such a spasm of chastity in men. Again, the ranks of fallen women, which are rapidly thinned by loathsome diseases and horrid deaths are largely recruited from that class of unfortunates for whose fall faithless lovers or cunning, heartless libertines are chiefly responsible. The weak girl who, through too much trust, has been deceived and robbed of her dearest treasure, is disowned by relatives, shunned by her acquaintances, and turned out upon a cold world without money, without friends, without a character. What can she do ? Respectable employment she cannot find, for rumor follows her. There seems to be but one door open, the one which she herself so unintentionally opened. In despair, she enters the “open road to hell,” and to her first sad error adds a life of shame. Meanwhile the villain who betrayed her still maintains his standing in society, and plies his arts to win another victim. Is there not an unfair discrimination here ? Should not the secured be blackened with an infamy at least as deep as that which society casts on the one betrayed ? Fashion.-The temptation of dress, fine clothing, costly jewelry, and all the extravagances with which rich ladies array themselves, is in many cases too powerful for the weakened virtue of poor seamstresses, operatives, and servant girls, who have seen so much of vice as to have lost that instinctive loathing for it which they may have once experienced. Thinking to gain a life of ease, which means to gratify their love of show, they barter away their peace of mind for this world, all hope for the next, and only gain a little worthless tinsel the scorn of their fellow-creatures, and a host of loathsome diseases.

As we have shown, a child conceived in lust can no more be chaste by nature than a negro can be a Caucasian. But back of this there is a deeper cause, as we shall see, one that affects parents as well as offspring. Between infancy and puberty, are in operation, all those influenced mentioned under “Sexual Precocity.” The frequent custom of allowing children of the opposite sex to sleep together, even until eight or ten years of age, or longer is a dangerous one. We have known of instances in which little boys of seven or eight have been allowed to sleep with girls of fourteen or sixteen, in some of which most shameful lessons were taught, and by persons who would not be suspected of such an impropriety. In one instance a little boy of eight, occupying the same bed with three girls several years older, was used for illustration by the older girl in instructing the younger ones in the “modus operandi” of reproduction. The sexes should be carefully separated from each other at least as early as four or five years of age, under all circumstances which could afford opportunity for observing the physical differences of the sexes, or in any way serve to excite those passions which at this tender age should be wholly dormant.

Pretentiousness seems a specifically juvenile flaw. I expect to find it in high school and college kids, but I'm surprised to find it in adults. I think the reason is that experience beats it out of you.

A boy of ten or eleven has a few great sexual experiences—he thinks they’re great—but then he has the bad luck to get caught and get in trouble. They try to persuade him by punishment and other explanations that some different behavior is much better, but he knows by the evidence of his senses that nothing could be better. … The basic trouble here is that they do not really believe he has had the sexual experience. That objective factor is inconvenient for them; therefore it cannot exist. … The sensible course would be to accept it as a valuable part of further growth. But if this were done, they fear that the approved little hero would be a rotten apple to his peers, who now would suddenly all become precocious, abnormal, artificially stimulated, and prone to delinquency. The sexual plight of these children is officially not mentioned. The revolutionary attack on hypocrisy by Ibsen, Freud, Ellis, Dreiser, did not succeed this far. … The question here is not whether the sexuality should be discouraged or encouraged. That is an important issue, but far more important is that it is hard to grow up when existing facts are treated as though they do not exist. For then there is no dialog, it is impossible to be taken seriously, to be understood, to make a bridge between oneself and society.

The pre-homosexual boy is detached, not only from father and other boys, but from maleness and his own male body, including the first symbol of masculinity, his own penis…Homosexual behavior is the search for the lost masculine self. [...] By the early teenage years, unconscious drives to fill this emotional vacuum – to want to connect with his maleness – are felt as homoerotic desires. The next stage will be entry into the gay world.

~Do you like him much?
~I told you I like him a little. Where is the use of caring for him so very much? He is full of faults.
~Is he?
~All boys are.
~More than girls?
~Very likely. Wise people say it is folly to think anyboy perfect, and as to likes and diskiles, we should be friendly to all, and worship none.

[about his daughters and nieces having developed a natural curiosity about boys]

I liked my body growing up and I wasn't ashamed of it. I liked boys and didn't feel inhibited by them. Maybe it comes from having brothers and sharing a bathroom. The boys got the wrong impression of me at high school. They mistook forwardness for promiscuity. When they don't get what they want, they turn on you. I went through this period when all the girls thought I was loose and the boys said I was a nymphomaniac. The first boy I ever slept with was my boyfriend and we'd been going out a long time.

Flirtation.-We cannot find language sufficiently emphatic to express proper condemnation of one of the most popular forms of amusement indulged in at the present day in this country, under the guise of innocent association of the sexes. By the majority of people, flirtation is looked upon as harmless, if not useful, as some even consider, claiming that the experience gained by such associations is valuable to young persons, by making them familiar with the customs of society and the ways of the world. We have not the slightest hesitation in pronouncing flirtation as pernicious in the extreme. In exerts a malign influence alike upon the mental, the moral, and the physical constitution of those who indulge it. The young lady who has become infatuated with a passion for flirting, courting the society of young men simply for the pleasure derived from their attentions, is educating herself in a school which will totally unfit her for the enjoyment of domestic peace and happiness should she have all the conditions necessary for such enjoyment other than those which she herself must furnish. More than this, she is very likely laying the foundation for lifelong disease by the dissipation, late hours, late suppers, evening exposures, fashionable dressing, etc., the almost certain accompaniments of the vice we are considering. She is surely sacrificing a life of real true happiness for the transient fascinations of unreal enjoyment, pernicious excitement. It may be true, and undoubtedly is the case, that the greater share of the guilt of flirtation lies at the door of the female sex; but there do exist such detestable creature as male flirts. In general, the male flirt is a much less worthy character than the young lady who makes a pastime of flirtation. He is something more than a flirt. In nine cases out of ten, he is a rake as well. His object in flirting is to gratify a mean propensity at the expense of those who are pure and unsophisticated. He is skilled in the arts of fascination and intrigue. Slowly he winds his coils about his victim, and before she is aware of his real character, she has lost her own. Such wretches ought to be punished in a purgatory by themselves, made seven times hotter than for ordinary criminals. Society is full of these lecherous villains. They insinuate themselves into the drawing-rooms of the most respectable families; they are always on hands at social gathering of every sort. They haunt the ball-room the theater, and the church, when they can forward their infamous plans by seeming to be pious. Not infrequently they are well supplied with a stock of pious cant, which they employ on occasion to make an impression. They are the sharks of society, and often seize in their voracious maws the fairest and brightest ornaments of a community. The male flirt is a monster. Every man ought to despise him; and every woman ought to spurn him as a loathsome social leper.

Begin therefore betimes nicely to observe your son's temper; and that, when he is under least restraint, in his play, and as he thinks out of your sight. See what are his predominate passions and prevailing inclinations; whether he be fierce or mild, bold or bashful, compassionate or cruel open or reserv'd, &c. For as these are different in him, so are your methods to be different, and your authority must hence take measures to apply itself different ways to him. These native propensities, these prevalencies of constitution, are not to be cur'd by rules, or a direct contest, especially those of them that are the humbler or meaner sort, which proceed from fear, and lowness of spirit: though with art they may be much mended, and turn'd to good purposes. But this be sure, after all is done, the bypass will always hang on that side that nature first plac'd it: And if you carefully observe the characters of his mind, now in the first scenes of his life, you will ever after be able to judge which way his thoughts lean, and what he aims at even hereafter, when, as he grows up, the plot thickens, and he puts on several shapes to act it.