Auntie Em! Auntie Em!” Homer’s VR came online, smiling. “I guess we got’em.” I snorted with relief. “And their little dog, too.” Homer - Dennis E. Taylor

Was I alive? Hmm, since no one had yet managed to define life rigorously, that was going to be a fun one. As the speaker at that long-ago panel in Vegas had pointed out, fire has most of the qualities of life but is not alive. According to Dr. Landers, I would be able to reproduce via printer-based autofactories. I certainly responded to stimuli, and acted with self-interest. The claim that life would have to be carbon-based was chauvinistic and narrow-minded, so yeah, I could consider myself alive.

A friendly reminder that you are a scourge on the universe. Do it a favor and disappear. This public service message brought to you by: Voluntary Extinction of Human Existence Means Earth’s Natural Transformation

You, sir, are a big baby.” Bridget gave the knot a final tweak. “And despite your best efforts, you look great.