The main obligation is to amuse yourself. - S. J. Perelman

Under a forehead roughly comparable to that of the Javanese or the Piltdown man are visible a pair of tiny pig eyes, lit up alternately by greed and concupiscence. His nose, broken in childhood by a self-inflicted blow with a hockey stick, has a prehensile tip, ever quick to smell out an insult; at the least suspicion of an affront, Perelman, who has the pride of a Spanish grandee, has been known to whip out his sword-cane and hide in the nearest closet.

Oh, son, I wish you hadn't become a scenario writer!" she sniffled.
"Aw, now, Moms," I comforted her, "it's no worse than playing the piano in a call house.

Before they made S J Perelman they broke the mold.