Top 15 Diana Wynne Jones Quotes

Don't you even feel how marvellous it is to have talked to one of the Little People? I said. No, not as the main thing, Grundo grunted. If you think like that, then you're treating him like something in a museum, not as a person.

What you do is find your centre - can you do that? My navel, you mean? I said. No, no! he howled. You're not a woman! Or are you?

Amazing. You're here, but you can't do a simple thing like raising light, or do I mean lazing right? Whichever. You can't. Why not? No one ever showed me how, I said. He swayed about, looking solemn. I quote, he said. I'm very well read in the literature of several worlds, you know, and I quote. What do they teach them in these schools?

"Oh, Lord! He's a weeper!" Grandad said disgustedly. "I wish I'd known. I'd have stayed away." "A lot of Merlins have cried when they prophesied," Dad pointed out. "I know. But I don't have to like it, do I?" Grandad retorted.

I have been with the Court all my life, travelling with the King's Progress. I didn't know how to go on. I sat and stared at this sentence, until Grundo said, "If you can't do it, I will." If you didn't know Grundo, you'd think this was a generous offer, but it was a threat really. Grundo is dyslexic. Unless he thinks hard, he writes inside out and backwards. He was threatening me with half a page of crooked writing with words like "inside" turning up as "sindie" and "story" as "otsyr".

I had a mitherable childhood. Nobody loved me. I think I have a right to try again, looking pwettier, don't you?

I don't believe this! Peter said. Why is it respectable not to know how to do things? Is it respectable to light a fire with a bar of soap? That, Charmain said haughtily, was an accident.

"Oh, what a sweet little doggie!" Mrs Baker cried out. "Is ooh hungwy, then?" She gave Waif the rest of the cake she was eating. Waif took it politely, ate it in one gulp and continued to beg. Mrs Baker gave her a whole cake from the plate. This caused Waif to beg more soulfully than ever. "I'm disgusted," Charmain told Waif.

So you'll be wanting all these hydrangeas chopped down, then? Whatever for? Charmain said. I like to chop things down, the kobold explained. Chief pleasure of gardening.

Tell me of this Wizard Howl of yours. Sophie's teeth chattered, but she said proudly, He's the best wizard in Ingary or anywhere else. If he'd only had time, he would have defeated that djinn. And he's sly and selfish and vain as a peacock and cowardly and you can't pin him down to anything. Indeed? asked Abdullah. Strange that you should speak so proudly such a list of vices, most loving of ladies. What do you mean — vices? Sophie asked angrily. I was just describing Howl.

I never said my wishes were supposed to do anyone any good, said the genie. In fact, I swore that they would always do as much harm as possible.

Maybe, he said, you should be more careful about whom you let your dog bite. Not I! said Jamal. I am a believer of free will. If my dog chooses to hate the whole human race except myself, it must be free to do so.

It is of course a magic carpet. Abdullah had heard that one before. He bowed over his tucked-up hands. Many and various are the virtues said to reside in carpets, he agreed. Which one does the poet of the sands claim for this? Does it welcome a man home to his tent? Does it bring peace to the hearth? Or maybe, he said, poking the frayed edge suggestively with one toe, it is said to never wear out?

Please, your story, or I shall offend the dignitaries of my kingdom by yawning at holy things.

Oh, thank goodness! he babbled. I didn't mean it - at least I did, but I don't mean it now, not any more! He flung one arm around Yam and twisted the other into Mordion's rolled cloak. They came. They rustled. Don't let them!