Frank Zappa Quotes

On a personal level, Freaking Out is a process whereby an individual casts off outmoded and restricting standards of thinking, dress, and social etiquette in order to express creatively his relationship to his immediate environment and the social structure as a whole.

I think it's really tragic when people get serious about stuff. It's such an absurdity to take anything really seriously ... I make an honest attempt not to take anything seriously: I worked that attitude out about the time I was eighteen, I mean, what does it all mean when you get right down to it, what's the story here? Being alive is so weird.

I'm vile and perverted.
I'm obsessed and deranged.
I've existed for years but very little has changed.
I'm the tool of the government and industry too.
For I'm destined to rule and regulate you.
You may think I'm pernicious, but you can't look away.
I'll make you think I'm delicious with the stuff that I say.
I'm the best you can get... have you guessed me yet?
I'm the slime oozing out of your TV set....

My best advice to anyone who wants to raise a happy, mentally healthy child is: Keep him or her as far away from a church as you can. Children are naive — they trust everyone. School is bad enough, but, if you put a child anywhere in the vicinity of a church, you're asking for trouble.

If your children ever find out how lame you really are, they'll murder you in your sleep.

I'll take a drive to Beverly Hills
Just before dawn
An' knock the little jockeys
Off the rich people's lawn
An' before they get up
I'll be gone, I'll be gone
Before they get up
I'll be knocking the jockeys off the lawn

Politics is the entertainment division of the military industrial complex.

Everything on this planet has something to do with music. Music functions in the realm of sculptured air. Polluted as our atmosphere might be, air is the thing that makes music work. Since all other things that occur in the sound domain are transmitted to the ear through that swirling mass, depending on how wide you want to make your definition, you could perceive quite a bit of human experience in terms of music.

I don't do drugs, nor have I ever believed in them. Am I a creative person? Then why do people think in order to be creative one must do drugs? Actually, I think people take them as an excuse to screw up in public, y'know, spill things or get silly. Drugs have slowed down civilization because we have to wait for people to get off their high before we can resume. They are the millstone around society's neck.

The rock and roll business is pretty absurd, but the world of serious music is much worse.

...be a jerk - go to work, be a jerk - go to work, be a jerk - go to work, be a jerk - go to work, do your job, and do it right, LIFE'S A BALL, *TV* tonight.

Modern Americans behave as if intelligence were some sort of hideous deformity.

So many books, so little time”
- Frank Zappa

The mind is like a parachute - it doesn't work if it's not open.

I do not belong to your organization. I know nothing about it. I'm not even interested in it – and yet, a request has been made for me to give what purports to be a keynote speech.
Before I go on, let me warn you that I talk dirty, and that I will say things you will neither enjoy nor agree with.
You shouldn't feel threatened though, because I am a mere buffoon, and you are all Serious American Composers.
For those of you who don't know, I am also a composer. I taught myself how to do it by going to the library and listening to records. I started when I was fourteen and I've been doing it for thirty years. I don't like schools. I don't like teachers. I don't like most of the things that you believe in – and if that weren't enough, I earn a living by playing the electric guitar.