Jeremy Clarkson Quotes

There's an especially marvellous moment in the wonderful film Planes, Trains and Automobiles when Steve Martin turns to John Candy and says, 'When you're telling these little stories, here's a good idea: have a point. It makes things so much more interesting for the listener.'

[the Ferrari F430 Speciale was] a bit wrong ... that smiling front end ... it looked like a simpleton ... [it] should have been called the 430 Speciale Needs.

There's been a massive cock up and as a result, there's a very slim chance some of our Hawkstone CIDER bottles might, there's no easy way of saying this, explode.
If the cap has the code L3160, open it underwater, pour it away and get in touch for a refund.
Really sorry about this but on the upside, the beer is fine and still delicious. As is the cider, in bottles that are unaffected. Which is almost all of them.

Francis Bacon once said there is no beauty that hath not some strangeness to its proportion. Cameron Diaz proves that- she's got a mouth like a slice of watermelon. But the Flying Scotsman proves it to be wrong. There is no strangeness at all. He is exquisite to behold, partly because he is so nicely balanced and partly because he seems to shout "I AM VERY POWERFUL'.

The Falcon was forever going wrong. Time and again Han and his rebel cohorts would have to bang on the dashboard with their fists to get some wayward system working. And this too helped give the ship a flawed, almost human quality. This is something I look for in all machines...

First off, the whole point of airborne troops is surprise: you don't know they're coming until they're there. But because Cain arrived 24 hours after the first wave, the surprise was gone. And to make matters worse, the landing zone was some eight miles from the bridge. So, thanks to some incompetent planning by the top brass in England, the Germans knew that Cain and his men were coming, they knew where he landed, they knew where he was going, and they had the wherewithal to do something about it.