Lindsey Davis Quotes

On the scale of country crime, rape tended to rank with shouting boo at chickens.

'How old now?'
'Thirty. Downhill to the dark boat across the Styx. Probably be sick over the side in Charon's ferry too…'

Justice never paid a poor man's bills.

In fact, making up a spiteful lie has become respectable. Today's "jesters" are outright public nuisances.

Discovering that a fraud exists is only the first step. It has to be proved and the proof has to be absolutely watertight.

Marcus! I thought you must have been developing other interests, but I never expected to find you with your arms locked round a fish...

They were not beggars; well, not in the usual sense. They were Christians, who wanted not just my nephews' money but their souls.

Popular men who laugh at your jokes pose a threat which blatant villains can never command.

Petronius would take his free bread buns and run. I happened to know that since Petro had been elected to the watch he had never cast a vote. He believed a man on a public salary should be impartial. I didn’t agree but I admired him being so stubborn in his eccentricities. Aufidius Crispus would be an unusual politician if he had allowed for such morality in the voters he was courting.

Never stop to breathe the pretty flower scents. The graves of the poor still stink.

I like my women in a few wisps of drapery: then I can hope for a chance to remove the wisps. If they start out with nothing I tend to get depressed because either they have just stripped off for someone else or, in my line of work, they are usually dead.

I asked why Grumio had had to turn to lesser things.'No call. In my father or grandfather's day all I would have needed in life were my cloak and shoes, my flask and strigil, a cup and knife to take to dinner, and a small wallet for my earnings. Everyone who could find the wherewithal would eagerly ask a wandering jokesmith in.'
'Sounds just like being a vagrant philosopher!'
'A cynic,' he agreed readily. 'Exactly. Most cynics are witty and all clowns are cynical. Meet us on the road, and who could tell the difference?’
'Me, I hope! I'm a good Roman. I'd take a five-mile detour to avoid a philosopher.'

Senator, don't let your judgement be warped by one heady moment.

"Do we think Locusta is still alive?"
"If so, she would have to be about two hundred."
"Sipping at the Fountain of Youth?"
"No, I think she was killed in the Year of the Four Emperors."
"Poison?"
"Natural causes—execution."
"Did she train up apprentices?"
"Yes, but the old crafts are dying. No one wants to be bothered. These days you can't find suppliers with the expertise, however big a bribe you offer."

I had been right in the first place. Getting involved with politicians is complete stupidity.