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Trauma isn’t just the sadness that comes from being beaten, or neglected, or insulted. That’s just one layer of it. Trauma also is mourning the child… - Stephanie Foo
" "Trauma isn’t just the sadness that comes from being beaten, or neglected, or insulted. That’s just one layer of it. Trauma also is mourning the childhood you could have had. The childhood other kids around you had. The fact that you could have had a mom who hugged and kissed you when you skinned your knee. Or a dad who stayed and brought you a bouquet of flowers at your graduation. Trauma is mourning the fact that, as an adult, you have to parent yourself.
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About Stephanie Foo
Stephanie Foo (born 1987) is a radio journalist, producer and author who was born in Malaysia and now lives in the USA. She has worked for Snap Judgment and This American Life. In 2022, she published What My Bones Know, a memoir about healing from complex PTSD.
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What My Bones Know (2022)
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The way we view trauma in this country is deeply broken. Because if you have complex PTSD, you’re probably going to have some deep feelings of shame and self-loathing. And if you are just diagnosing people by saying, “here are all the things that are wrong with you, you’re pathologically broken”, those people are not going to be able to heal. We need to say: “You’re not neurotypical. But there are advantages and disadvantages. Let’s explore how you can have better coping mechanisms for some of the disadvantages that you might be experiencing.”
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