All knowledge, the totality of all questions and answers, is contained in the dog. - Franz Kafka

My peers, lately, have found companionship through means of intoxication — it makes them sociable. I, however, cannot force myself to use drugs to cheat on my loneliness — it is all that I have — and when the drugs and alcohol dissipate, will be all that my peers have as well.

the poisonous world flows into my mouth like water into that of a drowning man

Self-control is something for which I do not strive. Self-control means wanting to be effective at some random point in the infinite radiations of my spiritual existence.