North Korea is the country that the monkeys in The Wizard of Oz came from. - Lewis Black

I don't know if you realize, but I use the word "Fuck," so that I can think of other stuff.

Is milk good or bad?... I rest my case. You don't know. You don't know anymore, and a lot of you are sitting there thinking "Fuck, I'm an adult, I don't have to drink that shit anymore!" When I was a kid, you knew milk was good, 'cause there was only one kind of milk: Moo-Cow fuck milk, and that was it.

[on Public Works Projects] You see what I felt they should have done for our first public works project is build a giant wall across the entire border of Canada...because THAT'S where the cold air comes from!