I understand now that no one else in the world knows what I should do. The experts don't know, the ministers, the therapists, the magazines, the auth… - Glennon Doyle

Being human is not hard because you're doing it wrong it's hard because you're doing it right. You will never change the fact that being human is hard, so you must change your idea that it was every supposed to be easy.

What if parenting became less about telling our children who they should be and more about asking them again and again forever who they already are? Then, when they tell us, we would celebrate instead of concede. It's not: I love you no matter which of my expectations you meet or don't meet. It's: My only expectation is that you become yourself. The more deeply I know you, the more beautiful you become to me. If someone tells you who they are, consider how lucky you are to be graced with that gift. Don't respond with an eviction notice, a permission slip, or a concession speech. Un-God yourself. Gasp in awe and applaud with gusto.

Decades after that day in the therapist's office, Donald Trump was elected president. A friend called me and said, "This is the apocalypse. This is the end of our country as we know it." I said, "I hope so. Apocalypse means uncovering. Gotta uncover before you can recover." She said, "Oh, God, not more recovery talk. Not now." "No, listen — this feels to me like we've hit rock bottom! Maybe that means we're finally ready for the steps. Maybe we'll admit that our country has become unmanageable. Maybe we'll take a moral inventory and face our open family secret: that this nation — founded upon 'liberty and justice for all' — was built while murdering, enslaving, raping, and subjugating millions. Maybe we'll admit that liberty and justice for all has always meant liberty for white straight wealthy men. Then maybe we'll gather the entire family at the table — the women and the gay and black and brown folks and those in power — so that we can begin the long, hard work of making amends. I've seen this process heal people and families. Maybe our nation can heal this way, too.