If Biden is elected, there's a good chance you will be dead within the year. - Scott Adams

The fastest way to spot a weasel is to look at a shiny surface. The second-fastest way is to look for people who are certain about the future. When a person conveys a sense of certainty during times of great uncertainty, that is either a sign of mental illness called "leadership" or a sign of a weasel who is trying to get his way.

They say that dogs lick their own genitalia because they can. But I think it's at least partially because they don't have the Internet.

My philosophy is that every phone conversation has a loser.