Marriage, like spinach and opera, was something I had never thought I would like. - Jasper Fforde

"You'll forgive me for saying this," said Webastow, looking over his glasses, "but this is the most harebrained piece of unadulterated stupidity that any government has ever undertaken anywhere."
"Thank you very much," replied Ms. Yogert courteously. "I'll make sure your compliments are forwarded to Prime Minister van de Post."

"How is the faith-unification business?"
"We've nearly got everyone," said Joffy with a smile. "The atheists came on board last week. Once we had suggested that 'god' could be a set of essentially beneficent physical rules of the cosmos, they were only too happy to join. In fact, apart from a few scattered remnants of faith leaders who can't quite come to terms with the loss of their power, influence and associated funny hats, it's all looking pretty good."

"Do I have to talk to insane people?"
"You're a librarian now. I'm afraid it's mandatory."