Masculinity is about being a man within a group of men. Above all things, masculinity is about what men want from each other. - Jack Donovan

Boys and girls don't pair off at birth and scurry off to a dank cave together. Humans have always been social animals. We live in cooperative groups. Our bodies sort us out into groups of males or females. We interact socially as members of one group or the other. These groups aren't arbitrary or cultural- they're basic and biological. Males have to negotiate male and female groups as males. Males aren't simply reacting to female groups as males. We react to other males, as males. Who we are has a lot to do with how we see ourselves in relationship to other males, as members of the male group.

A metaphor for what happens to men living in a secure peace of plenty like your own, the bonobo way looks eerily familiar. Aren't most men today spoiled momma's boys without father figures, without hunting or fighting or brother-bonds, whose only masculine outlet is promiscuous sex?

George Orwell wrote in his "Notes on Nationalism" that, for the pacifist, the truth that, "Those who 'abjure' violence can only do so because others committing violence on their behalf," is obvious but impossible to accept.