George Denis Patrick Carlin (May 12, 1937 – June 22, 2008) was an American stand-up comedian, actor, author, singer, voice artist, and comedian, noted especially for his irreverent attitude and his observations on politics, language, psychology, and religion, as well as some taboo subjects.
Biography information from
Wikiquote·
Portrait adapted from
Wikimedia Commons, Little David Records (Public domain / CC0)
Also Known As
Birth Name:
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Alternative Names:
George Dennis Carlin
•
George Dennis Patrick Carlin
Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do, every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a special list of ten things he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these ten things, he has a special place, full of fire and smoke and burning and torture and anguish, where he will send you to live and suffer and burn and choke and scream and cry forever and ever 'til the end of time!
But He loves you. He loves you, and He needs money! He always needs money! He's all-powerful, all-perfect, all-knowing, and all-wise, but somehow just can't handle money!
You know how you speed up baseball? Everybody gets one swing. That's it, one swing, fuck you, you're out, sit down!
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