It's more fun to be a fan than a critic. I'm not looking to spend my life tearing things down, when it can be so satisfying to build things up. - James Clear

In the long-run (and often in the short-run), your willpower will never beat your environment. The more disciplined your environment is, the less disciplined you need to be. Don't swim upstream.

Problem #3: Goals restrict your happiness. The implicit assumption behind any goal is this: “Once I reach my goal, then I’ll be happy.” The problem with a goals-first mentality is that you’re continually putting happiness off until the next milestone. I’ve slipped into this trap so many times I’ve lost count. For years, happiness was always something for my future self to enjoy. I promised myself that once I gained twenty pounds of muscle or after my business was featured in the New York Times, then I could finally relax. Furthermore, goals create an “either-or” conflict: either you achieve your goal and are successful or you fail and you are a disappointment. You mentally box yourself into a narrow version of happiness. This is misguided. It is unlikely that your actual path through life will match the exact journey you had in mind when you set out. It makes no sense to restrict your satisfaction to one scenario when there are many paths to success.

The way to help someone is not to critique what makes them smaller, but to encourage what makes them larger.