Cheech:Hey man, give me a sip. Chong:Okay... Cheech:Hey, that's pee! Chong: I know. It's for my probation officer. Cheech: Oh. Does he drink pee? - Cheech & Chong

Cheech: Uh, his name is RAAAAAALPH, man.

Cheech: [sings] Mexican Americans don't like to just get into gang fights,
they like flowers and music and white girls named Debbie too.
Mexican Americans are named Chata and Chella and Chemma
and have a son in law named Jeff.
Mexican Americans don't like to get up early in the morning
but they have to so they do it real slow.
Mexican Americans love education so they go to night school
and take Spanish and get a B.
Mexican Americans love their nanas and their nonos
and their ninas and their ninos, nanoo nanoo nina nonoo!
Mexican Americans don't like to go to the movies where the
dude has to wear contact lenses to make his blue eyes brown
cause don't it make my brown eyes blue. And that's all I got, how do ya like it?"
Chong: Oh that's good.
Cheech: That's like a protest tune, man.
Chong: Yeah, I dig that. But you know, while you were singing that, I wrote another tune.
Cheech: Oh yeah?
Chong: Yeah, it's, it's like the same thing, only different. You want to hear it?
Cheech: Yeah, yeah.
Chong: It's like a little more rock and roll than that one.
Cheech: All right, get down.
Chong: Something like this here.
[sings] Beaners! Beaners!
[speaking] I gotta work a little more on the lyrics.
Cheech: Yeah that's heavy man. [phone rings] Keep working on it, man.
Chong: [singing in the background] Beaners! Beaners gonna...
Cheech: Hello. Mexican Americans like to answer telephone calls and say hello to whoever's on the other end.

Street guy: Well, tell you what, brother, how ‘bout a watch, man? I know y’all ain’t got a watch, cause if ya had a watch, you know it be night time and night time ain’t no time to be in this here neigborhood, man. So, how ‘bout a watch?
Hey, hippie, how ‘bout you? You want a watch?
Chong: Ah oh, no thank you, man. I’m not into time.