Don't be misled by weighing machines. Weighing machines are… - Lennie Lower

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Don't be misled by weighing machines. Weighing machines are the most lying things on earth, and should be treated accordingly. When you see "16 st. 10 lb." on the dial, think of the number you first thought of and stick to it. And don't be disheartened if results do not come immediately. Slim women may look slick, but a fat woman stays. Ask any corset manufacturer.

Lennie Lower

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About Lennie Lower

Leonard "Lennie" Waldemere Lower (24 September 1903 – 19 July 1947) was an Australian humourist who is still considered by many to be the comic genius of Australian journalism. Lower's drinking was "legendary", hence the titles of his two best-known books: "Here's luck!" is a well-known Australian drinking toast, as is "Here's another!"

Also Known As

Alternative Names: Leonard Waldermar Lower

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David Sedaris Jerome K. Jerome Raymond Chandler Dave Barry Terry Pratchett

Additional quotes by Lennie Lower

As the old adage says, "There is many a true word spoken in chess."

Have you ever noticed how, in all books, people coming into a room always gently close the door behind them? I suppose the reason for this is that if they closed the door in front of themselves they'd still be outside.

I never did care much for cocktail parties. I'm all the time looking for a place to put the olive-stones. You can't park them under the table like chewing-gum. Cherries are easy; they just go down whole with the drink, toothpick and all.

Don't be misled by weighing machines. Weighing machines are the most lying things on earth, and should be treated accordingly. When you see "16 st. 1… - Lennie Lower

About Lennie Lower

Also Known As

Additional quotes by Lennie Lower