I sneak a look over and consider a blow job, but even I know giving head in the middle of a demolition derby is risky, - John Waters

Connie goes off the charts and into a whole new realm of music. Suddenly channeling Ol’ Dirty Bastard’s scary voice and skyrocketing to a new level of coolness, Connie raps an all-new ghetto version of the once-tepid theme song to Follow the Boys,

She’s never really hungry. That would be weak. Oh, she knows she needs fuel. Why do you think they invented crackers? That’s all she eats. Not the cheap ones. No Ritz or saltines for her. The good ones. From Eddie’s on Charles Street. Or Graul’s in Ruxton. Imported. They turn to waste quickly and quietly. In. Out. Little pellets that leave no trace or mess. She remembers to flush the already-clean water in the house’s toilet several times a day just so it will be pristine enough to receive her regularly scheduled but oh-so-spare eliminations with the proper hygienic welcome.

Catholics have more extreme sex lives because they're taught that pleasure is bad for you. Who thinks it's normal to kneel down to a naked man who's nailed to a cross? It's like a bad leather bar.