I got offended on behalf of my imaginary kids. [...] My chi… - John Mulaney

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I got offended on behalf of my imaginary kids. [...] My children are not gonna be playing out on grass. They will be up in their rooms playing violent video games and catfishing pedophiles.

John Mulaney

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About John Mulaney

John Edmund Mulaney (born 26 August 1982) is an American stand-up comedian, actor, writer, and producer.

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Alternative Names: John Edmund Mulaney

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J. D. Salinger Louis C.K. David Sedaris George Carlin Tina Fey

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You remember being 12, when you're like, "No one look at me or I'll kill myself."

Crazy people are like that. They have unlimited crazy currency. [...] The things they say mean nothing to them, but they mean everything to me.

I didn't mean to make it sound like we don't want children. We don't, but I didn't mean to make it sound like that.

I got offended on behalf of my imaginary kids. [...] My children are not gonna be playing out on grass. They will be up in their rooms playing violen… - John Mulaney

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