I like waging feuds [...] They get me going and make me perform better. I don't start them but I always finish them. - Piers Morgan

Right, now all you have to do – and I know it's hard because celebrities don't like doing anything for themselves – is actually change your security number.

It's hardly worth dignifying this man with a response. In any case, all he's been offering for information about my private life is a £50 reward. My friends think that's not nearly enough.

There is a type of snobbish, pompous journalist who thinks that the only news that has any validity is war, famine, pestilence or politics. I don't come from that school. I certainly appreciate those kinds of stories. I've certainly devoted a lot of time on my show to them. But I also have a much broader spectrum of what I think is interesting, relevant, current or newsworthy.