there's a reason regular people don't appear on TV: we're boring. - David Sedaris

Her face was like the weather in one of those places with no discernible seasons.

Often I'd take out my magnifying glass and stare into the chaos that was her face.

My hands tend to be full enough dealing with people who hate me for who I am. Concentrate too hard on the millions of people who hate you for what you are and you're likely to turn into one of those unkempt, sloppy dressers who sag beneath the weight of the two hundred political buttons they wear pinned to their coats and knapsacks. I haven't got the slightest idea how to change people, but still I keep a long list of prospective candidates just in case I should ever figure it out.