[Death is] the last big move of your life. The hearse is like the van, the pallbearers are your close friends, the only ones you could really ask to … - Jerry Seinfeld
" "[Death is] the last big move of your life. The hearse is like the van, the pallbearers are your close friends, the only ones you could really ask to help you with a big move like that. And the casket is that great, perfect box you've been looking for your whole life. The only problem is once you find it, you're in it.
English
Collect this quote
About Jerry Seinfeld
Jerome Allen "Jerry" Seinfeld (born April 29, 1954) is an American stand-up comedian, actor, writer, and producer. He is best known for playing a semi-fictionalized version of himself in the sitcom Seinfeld, which he created and wrote with Larry David. The show aired on NBC from 1989 until 1998, becoming one of the most acclaimed and popular American sitcoms of all time. As a stand-up comedian, Seinfeld specializes in observational comedy.
Biography information from Wikiquote
Also Known As
Alternative Names:
Cable Boy
•
Jerome Allen Seinfeld
•
Mr. Steinfeld
Related quotes. More quotes will automatically load as you scroll down, or you can use the load more buttons.
Additional quotes by Jerry Seinfeld
To me, clothes spend most of their lives waiting, if you look at it. In the closet, in the hamper, in the drawer. The shirts in your house right now are going "He never picks me...". Laundry day is their only exciting day, 'cause the washing machine is the nightclub of clothes. It's dark, bubbles happening; they're all kind of dancing around in there. A shirt grabs the underwear: "C'mon, babe, let's go!"
I also had braces. [...] Glasses at 10, braces at 12: I was thrilled to have these things on my face. I mean, y'know, [I'm] thinkin' about talkin' to a girl for the very first time in my life, I want a lot of corrective apparatus on my head. [pause for laughter] This is what women like! I said to my parents "Let's not stop now! Let's get me a hearing aid! Orthopedic shoes!"
Try QuoteGPT
Chat naturally about what you need. Each answer links back to real quotes with citations.
Gutter Ball You don’t think we’re horrible parents? You take a kid bowling now, they have these rails that come up out of the gutters. So when the stupid kid rolls the ball, it has to hit a pin. Has to. We eliminated the gutter ball. Nice preparation for life. I think the gutter ball is really the only life lesson a kid really needs to have. You either do the thing you’re doing right, or there’s a huge ka-klunk sound
Loading...