Across the gently rolling hills, Beyond high mountain peaks, Along the shores of distant seas, There's something my heart seeks. But there's no peac… - Bruce Coville

"We stood at the top of the stairs and looked down. Neither of us moved. I had a feeling we were each waiting for the other to go first.
"Dark down there," said Chris after a while.
"Sure is," I said. I was squinting down the steps, trying to make something out.
"Person might get hurt, stumbling around."
"Sure could," I said.
"They ought to keep it better lit."
"Sure should," I said, getting ready to turn around and leave.
"Well, let's get on with it," said Chris. She started walking down the stairs.
I couldn't believe it! I thought she had been trying to talk herself out of going down there. The truth was, she had just been building up her courage.
Now I had to build up mine!"

my arms, around my legs, and suddenly the force field disappeared. I could move again! The only problem was, the instant I did, my clothes all fell off. The laser had sliced my shirt, my pants, my shoes and socks, even my underwear, into pieces — and had done it all without touching my skin. “Get me out of here!” I yelled. “Get me some clothes!” No answer. Did that mean there wasn’t anyone there? Just as well, I decided, since I didn’t have any clothes on. But how long were the aliens going to leave me here? Or was someone watching me even now — watching, but not speaking? That made sense, in a way. If the alien mission was to study earthlings, then probably they were doing that right now — especially since I was the only one they had. I decided if I was going to be the sample earthling, I was going to do my best not to act like an idiot. So I began to take deep breaths. I felt myself getting a little calmer. I mean, it wasn’t like no one had ever seen me naked before. I’ve been to the doctor. And next year I would be taking showers in gym class. Come to think of it, given my choice of getting stuck naked in front of a bunch of aliens, or in a seventh-grade gym class, I’d choose the aliens any day. At least they won’t flick your butt with a wet towel! Unfortunately, just as I was getting calm, my little chamber started to fill with gas. Was this a test, to see if I would panic? Were they going to knock me out and do some medical exams? Or were they going to kill me and dissect me? I held my breath until my lungs were

How in the world do you tellyour wife that her mother was born a unicon?