My paternal grandfather, George, had been a regular soldier… - John Cooper Clarke

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My paternal grandfather, George, had been a regular soldier in India until chucking-out time in 1948, and funnily enough bore an uncanny resemblance to Mahatma Gandhi (who apparently suffered from corns and bad breath, in other words a supercallousedfragilemysticplaguedwithhalitosis, as Julie Andrews and Dick Van Dyke almost sang).

John Cooper Clarke

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About John Cooper Clarke

John Cooper Clarke (born 25 January 1949) is a British performance poet from Salford, Lancashire. He is considered a major figure in punk poetry and punk literature.

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Alternative Names: John Clarke

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Raymond Chandler David Sedaris J. D. Salinger Woody Allen Hunter S. Thompson

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I told my dad, who quizzed me about what kind of purse I might reasonably expect for this performance. I told him it was a benefit, all in a good cause, and that I wasn't the only one working for nothing. 'Nothing?' he replied. 'Anybody will employ you for nothing'.

Everyone thinks they'll make a better judge than any judge don't they? You see these nonces getting off with a six quid fine and being given a house next door to a school. And you think 'I wouldn't have done that'.

You can count on him. He'll always let you down.

My paternal grandfather, George, had been a regular soldier in India until chucking-out time in 1948, and funnily enough bore an uncanny resemblance … - John Cooper Clarke

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