I wanted to obey my Director, I subjected myself to all the trials; I wanted to help the spirit with mortification of the body, I led an intense life… - Adelaide Coari

But why does St. Francis de Sales want obedience to the guide who is a faithful friend? Isn't it enough that I alone try to place myself in the eternal law? Alone?… My nature seeks help, it seeks it every day in brothers with whom it believes it feels in communion of ideas and affections. And I would be happy – how many times, my God, have I wished to find myself with such a spirit – if I could find in one of the priests I approach, the guiding friend.

The first condition, however, is this, to find the director who is a faithful friend. DC [Don Carlo Grugni] I would have obeyed, obeyed with all my soul. Because? Before I spoke, I felt heard by him, the expression of his soul in what lived most generously, they were the desires of my [sic]. We felt united in spirit, in thought of action. What was obedience in me then? If not my greatest and most intimate joy!

In the confessor I asked for a friend, the soul that loved my soul, that shared I would almost say the nature of my feelings, that participated in my vocation. I was asking conformity to feel ; this seemed to me to be an essential sharing so that he could direct the actions of my spirit, he shouldn't have taken me outside my natural center. It's true, I asked to be able in a certain way to influence the soul of the confessor, to sincerely give him my impressions of my conduct. It seemed to me that our action must in some way be reciprocal. Certainly St. Francis and St. Francesca had this communion of feelings over them.