The Onion lost all credibility for me a while back when they did a “story” on the Hudson River cleanup GE was forced to do. As some of you may recall, one of my neighbors is a GE veep, and he was directly in charge of this, so from him I found out all kinds of details the press did not bother to pass along to the public. Since The Onion apparently gets its info from other papers, the story was full of inaccuracies. What are they, Michael Moore? Anyway, I stopped reading The Onion from then on. (2005)

Androids (i.e., artificial humans) tend to blur the line between living and non-living. Especially in a case like the Human Torch, where his origin tends to establish him as something much more than a clever assemblage of non-organic parts. The “instability” which originally caused him to burst into flame spontaneously indicates there’s an unknown factor involved. Push come to shove, I would put Jim Hammond into his own category, and grant that, altho he is “not of woman born,” he is, in a true sense, alive. In other words, not a toaster. (2006)

I kinda wish the internet had been around. Or at least some major force that could have screamed “Why are you turning Magneto into a half-assed clone of Doctor Doom?” and cataloged each and every way in which this transformation violated the long standing continuity. (2007)