Paul Jenkins Quotes

You know, Mr. Dinsdale, this all sounds delightfully bananas but I’m kinda monkeyed out this week.

Wil had always suspected Mrs. Chappell’s cats were onto something: if one can act as if everything is right with the world while all around clowns dressed in snorkels, flippers, and tutus are throwing bowls of neon-green custard at each other then, by golly, everything is right with the world.

The Quantum Needle was theoretically used to repair any tears in the fabric of the space-time continuum, though how it actually worked in the field was a matter of some debate. When Wil had pressed the question, Mr. Dinsdale had simply mumbled, “quantum physics,” which seemed to be his standard response to any question he didn’t know the answer to.

Wil had learned as a child that the best way to deal with goons—the more muscle-bound the better—was to confuse them. For while the human bicep was something anyone with a little patience could build up to an impressive size, the human brain was less a variable and more something a person was born with. Goons, in his experience, were rarely born with very large ones.

Wil felt like a nun at a fashion show: he was clearly out of his comfort zone, and would probably be better off sticking to his usual habits.

I see where you're going with this, Wil. Bravo!"
"Do you?" replied Wil. "Because honestly, Mr. Dinsdale, if you know where I'm going, perhaps you'd be kind enough to give me directions!

Wil Morgan awoke from his regular anxiety dream, in which he had just finished second in a World’s Biggest Failure competition.

He’d carefully judged the measure of his opponent’s resolve, and knew that a man as greedy and weak willed as Marcus James would always be the one to crack first under duress.

The next morning, Wil Morgan awoke from a fitful night’s sleep and a rather disturbing variation of his anxiety dream in which he’d arrived too late to register for the World’s Biggest Failure competition and had been disqualified.

We all know that life isn’t fair. But life should at least come with a printed copy in large type in case of misunderstandings and overbilling.

That’s it! That’s the utterly random mental chaos I was looking for! No one’s going to predict that response! Anything Else?

Outside, the city streets were gray and sodden. Indeed, Wil often fancied this was the city where they had invented the color gray.

He began to think of better days, all of which lay in the opposite direction from the one he was facing.

There was evidence of neither angels nor ambulance workers, which Wil took to be a positive sign.

He stopped in his tracks to consider what might be Actually Occurring, as opposed to Apparently Occurring.