Ruth Rudner Quotes

Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love. I'd stepped in it a few times.

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

I had the most boring office job in the world...I used to clean the windows on envelopes.

My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married adn I didn't want him to.

My mother buried three husbands...and two of them were only napping.

When I was a kid, I had two friends, and they were imaginary and they would only play with each other.

My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head.

I don't panic when I get lost. I just change where I want to go.

The airline oxygen masks don't really help you. They're just there to muffle the screams.

When I eventually met Mr. Right, I had no idea his first name was Always.

Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all
respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be.

I love being married. It's so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life