Nigerian poet and actress
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Who do you think socialize both male and female children? They are mothers. We are responsible for raising our children. We are the ones that help men to subjugate women as second citizens. We are the ones who say to our girls ‘go to the kitchen and cook and tell the boys to go and play football.’ So, the narrative and dialogue must change from us women. Even in Europe and America we are talking about what is the percentage of women in government? How many female heads of government do they have? And in Nigeria, how many women are in the (government’s) cabinet? And a few in the position of authority always look subdued and submissive as if they have to apologize for being intelligent. A man can parade his intelligence and status but a woman has to apologize for being bright because of the way we are raising them. You know we always tell women not to show themselves so that they can find a husband. So, if we want peace and harmony in the world, put women in power because they have in-built divine virtues of nurture, love, tolerance, patient, perseverance. They have lived the life of victims and they know how to handle things better.
I am not dogmatic about anything. I go with the flow. I flow with the tide. And I accept what comes my way. My husband was chosen for me and I called him my ‘Angel Gabriel’. He was a marvelous man who saw the talent I didn’t see and encouraged me to blossom in the arts. He had played his part. If I was meant to marry after his demise another man would have come into my life. And if the man didn’t show up it meant that he wasn’t meant for me. That is how I live my life. My life has been ordered, orchestrated, and going smoothly. I have not lost anything, so I am blessed.
In life you must always be moving. And you must not feel sorry for yourself because the world doesn’t owe anybody anything. Our parents bring us into this world and we must fend for ourselves. Again, once you have had a good upbringing it will help. And if you stumble in the process, you get up quickly and start moving. In my case, I have been lucky to have the strength, motivation, and guidance to keep going.
Well, it is by respecting the people who put me in the limelight. You must always be aware that life is not about you. So, if I have been in the limelight for decades and still relevant, it is because people who nurtured me to limelight still see something interesting about me. When I started out as an actor and a journalist, I didn’t think I had a choice but I was chosen. I was turned around. I was made to see my true purpose in life. Apart from that, hard work counts having switched from the corporate world into the arts embracing both journalism and acting simultaneously.
I am not in the business to just play a goody-goody, I am in the business of playing strong characters, delineated, clear, vibrant, and believable. So whether the person is unhappy or wicked has nothing to do with it. When people who you see as wicked are doing bad things, you should try and see what is worrying them. The character I play, Yahimba, is hurting and she does not have a relationship with her children. Such a woman will be bitter and hurting. What people call wickedness is somebody trying to find her way through life.