Riker tells Data to just get on with it already, so Data says Ferengi are like Yankee traders from 18th-century America. This indicates that, in the 24th century, the traditional practice of using 600-year-old comparisons is still in vogue, like when you’re stuck in traffic on the freeway, and say, “Man, this is just like Vasco de Gama trying to go around the Cape of Good Hope!

Wesley Crusher will only live on in reruns. I will never get to bring him to life again, and that makes me a little sad. I’d like to try on his spacesuit and his oversized brain one last time and see how they fit now. After I posted that entry, the

Because my brain is broken. There’s all sorts of interesting medical and neurochemical reasons for it, and I’ve learned everything I can about them,* but knowing all of that isn’t enough to make my brain magically start processing serotonin and norepinephrine and dopamine in a balanced way,

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Still, I accepted this invitation to speak tonight because if one of my fundamental rules for living a successful and happy life is: don't be the smartest person in the room, it's corollary is: if you look around and see that you are the smartest person in the room, find a new room. This is the only way you keep growing and challenging yourself to be the most interesting human you can be.

It’s painful to recall, but I’m not ashamed, because all those thoughts — which I thankfully don’t have anymore, thanks to medical science and therapy — were not my fault any more than the allergies that clog my sinuses when the trees in my neighborhood start doin’ it every spring are my fault. It’s just part of who I am. It’s part of how my brain is wired, and because I know that, I can medically treat it, instead of being a victim of it.

The audience has been lined up for over an hour already, and I know from experience that an audience’s willingness to enjoy your show is inversely proportional to the amount of time you keep them waiting past the time on the ticket, which is, in this case, 8 p.m.

Things every person should have:

•A nemesis.
•An evil twin.
•A secret headquarters.
•An escape hatch.
•A partner in crime.
•A secret identity.