Carlson: But Canada's a solid place with good-looking women and good fishing. We should invade.

When I first came to Canada, I thought it was going to be easy to be a Canadian; like so many stupid Americans, I pictured Canada as simply some northern, colder, possibly more provincial region of the United States-I imagined it would be like moving to Maine, or Minnesota.

That is not the question. But if I wanted to, I could take Kyiv in two weeks.

Canada has become trouble recently … It’s always the worst Americans who go there … We could have taken them over so easy. But I only want the western part, with the ski areas, the cowboys, and the right wingers. They’re the only good parts of Canada.

The acquisition of Canada this year, as far as the neighborhood of Quebec, will be a mere matter of marching, and will give us experience for the attack of Halifax the next, and the final expulsion of England from the American continent.

It is wonderful to feel the grand ness of Canada in the raw.

I think I've done what I set out to do, which is give Canada a glimpse of who we are.

I want to lead Canada. All of Canada, not just parts of Canada. ... I am not going to write off certain parts of the country just because we had a tough past 10 years. Or, tough past 100 years.

It is wonderful to feel the grandness of Canada in the raw.

Oh, I think Canada is full too!
Although it’s the second largest country in the world, our useful area has been reduced.
Our immigration policy is disgusting:
We plunder southern countries by depriving them of future leaders,
and we want to increase our population to support economic growth.
It’s crazy!

We would drive to Canada, where it would probably be legal for us to get married- it was Canada where they let people do whatever they wanted because it was too cold to bother stopping them.

Once when I was Prime Minister, I came back from an international conference, and I set foot in Canada... To me, there, I said: Chrétien, you've got the easiest job of all these guys there, from all round the globe. Original: Quand j'étais premier ministre, pis je revenais d'une conférence internationale, pis je mettais le pied au Canada ... À moi, là, je dis : Chrétien, tu as la job la plus facile de tous ces gars-là alentour du globe.

If I wanted, I could have ruled half of Bombay.

I am embarrassed at the thought of building a wall on the southern border. (Cheers, applause.) Embarrassed. And I want to tell you, you don't know the fence that's in Canada. You don't -- I just recently went to Canada. I went into Canada, it took me three seconds. Coming out took two hours. Two hours in line to get back into our country. Something is wrong. We need to stop scapegoating people. People come here because they want to feed their families because they're starving in other locations. We need a foreign policy that addresses the entire Western Hemisphere in this regard.