Waiting is still an occupation. It is having nothing to wait for that is terrible. - Cesare Pavese

Here's the difficulty about suicide: it is an act of ambition that can be committed only when one has passed beyond ambition.

She didn't seem dead. There was only a swelling of the lips, as if she were angry. The strange thing was her idea of renting a painter's studio, having an armchiar, no less, drawn up s she could die in front of the window that looked toward Superga. A cat had given her away–it was in the room with her, and the next day, miaowing and scratching the door, it had made them open.

We want Realism's wealth of experience and Symbolism's depth of feeling. All art is a problem of balance between two opposites.