Cold pig's face is one of the best things in the world for breakfast. - William Maginn

The best of all pies is a grouse-pie.

No cigar-smoker ever committed suicide.

Marrying girls is a nice matter always; for they are as cautious as crows plundering a corn-field. ... I don't myself, I profess, upon principle, see any objection to marrying a widow. ... If a woman, however, has had more than three husbands, she poisons them: avoid her.