No juice to be hopeless, no heart to be sad. I tried in the wind, tried in the sand. - Leonard Cohen

I don't think about my childhood much. I don't think it's a legitimate explanation of one's life. I think in order to survive one must be reborn, one must overcome one's childhood, the injustices, and recognize the privileges. You can't use your past as an alibi.

Listen to the one who has not been wounded, the one who says, 'It is not good that man should be alone.' Recall your longing to the loneliness where it was born, so that when she appears, she will stand before you, not against you. Refine your longing here, in the small silver music of her preparations, under the low-built shelter of repentance.

When you're not feeling holy, your loneliness says that you've sinned.