But instead I am applying for a job as an elf. Even worse t… - David Sedaris

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But instead I am applying for a job as an elf. Even worse than applying is the very real possibility that I will not be hired, that I couldn't even find work as an elf. That's when you know you're a failure.

David Sedaris

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humorous

English

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About David Sedaris

David Raymond Sedaris (born December 26, 1956) is an American humorist, comedian, author, and radio contributor.

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Alternative Names: David Raymond Sedaris

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J. D. Salinger Margaret Atwood John Irving Steve Martin Terry Pratchett

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I won't put in a load of laundry, because the machine is too loud and would drown out other, more significant noises - namely, the shuffling footsteps of the living dead.

Another thing I love about the beach is sitting in the sun, mainly for the lazy kind of talk it generates. A person can say anything with lotion on, and I’m more than willing to listen.

You can't brace yourself for famine if you've never known hunger.

But instead I am applying for a job as an elf. Even worse than applying is the very real possibility that I will not be hired, that I couldn't even f… - David Sedaris

About David Sedaris

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