Without a doubt, these children deserve a hope. By loving them, we need to show them that life can be different. Yes, their life is hard today, but tomorrow – with hope and trust in God – it will be different

Teach a child to love others as it loves itself; let this be the first and most impressive injunction that invades its ears; allow it never to infringe this rule in its conduct toward others, and never to associate with those who do; teach it that the highest virtue is forbearance and helpfulness; inculcate the equal rights of all to the joys of the universe; forbid all competitive indulgence as degrading and ungallant; teach it the propriety of exercising its combativeness against the tendencies of the inanimate, never against a fellow-creature; allow only those amusements which encourage kindness and the rivalry of good-doing;—and when that child grows to manhood or womanhood, and encounters the conditions of more serious life, it will encounter them, not ideally, perhaps, but in a spirit very remote from that in which it would have approached them had it come up thru conditions of incessant egoism.

Believe this difficult truth. Showing respect in the face of disrespect, love in the face of hate, trust in the face of betrayal, and serenity in the face of turmoil, will teach your children more than all the moral lectures by all the preachers since the dawn of time.

I think children give you the unique opportunity to genuinely love something more than you love yourself. And I think that is really important for being happy because the moment you love something more than you love yourself, you're no longer self-obsessed.

Children should above all be taught self-reliance, love for all men, altruism, mutual charity, and more than anything else, to think and reason for themselves... Aim at creating free men and women, free intellectually, free morally, unprejudiced in all respects, and above all things, unselfish.

self-love is a sincere
acceptance of the past
an agreement to make
the most of the present
and a willingness to allow
the best to occur in the future

[I]f we can bring our children understanding, comfort, and hopefulness when they need this kind of support, then they are more likely to grow into adults who can find these resources within themselves later on. (from the introduction)

People say all the time that they’d do anything for the people they love. But would you really? Would you do anything? Would you give everything? I don’t know that a child knows that kind of selfless love. A mother, yes. A mother will clutch her children and jump from a moving car to keep them from harm. She will do it without thinking. But I don’t think the child knows how to do that, not instinctively. It’s something the child has to learn.

Raising Black children — female and male — in the mouth of a racist, sexist, suicidal dragon is perilous and chancy. If they cannot love and resist at the same time, they will probably not survive. And in order to survive they must let go. This is what mothers teach — love, survival — that is, self-definition and letting go. For each of these, the ability to feel strongly and to recognize those feelings is central: how to feel love, how to neither discount fear nor be overwhelmed by it, how to enjoy feeling deeply.

Being able to resolve conflicts peacefully is one of the greatest strengths we can give our children.

"To let ourselves be seen, deeply seen, vulnerably seen; to love with our whole hearts, even though there's no guarantee — and that's really hard, and I can tell you as a parent, that's excruciatingly difficult — to practice gratitude and joy in those moments of terror, when we're wondering, "Can I love you this much? Can I believe in this this passionately? Can I be this fierce about this?" just to be able to stop and, instead of catastrophizing what might happen, to say, "I'm just so grateful, because to feel this vulnerable means I'm alive." And the last, which I think is probably the most important, is to believe that we're enough. Because when we work from a place, I believe, that says, "I'm enough," then we stop screaming and start listening, we're kinder and gentler to the people around us, and we're kinder and gentler to ourselves."

Children need to know that they matter, that someone in this big, scary, beautiful world thinks that they are the sun, moon, and stars all rolled into one lovable little human. The world will hurt and disillusion them at times, no doubt, but knowing that they are loved beyond measure by someone who's got their back, knowing they are not alone, knowing they always have arms to run to when they're hurt or afraid, will help them to pick themselves up and move on, again and again and again.

Self-love is about knowing everything about yourself, however ugly or dark or bad your truth is, and accepting yourself with it. Self-love is about knowing how to transform your flaws into your strengths rather than hiding them inside you so that no one can see them. Self-love is about choosing yourself every single day to study your patterns, examine your behavior, knowing your thoughts (even if they are mean at times). Self-love is about creating a home deep inside you where you can be YOU without worrying about healing, pretending, or perfectionism. You are beautiful with your dark side not by hiding them under the mask of goodness.

Nothing works well if a child’s love needs are not met. Only the child who feels genuinely loved and cared for can do her best. You may truly love your child, but unless she feels it — unless you speak the love language that communicates to her your love — she will not feel loved. Filling the