Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into an ever smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill-designed for the purpose

Golf is a game in which attitude of mind counts for incomparably more than mightiness of muscle.

Golf is a mental disorder.

"Golf is a game where you score a 6, yell "Fore" and write down a 5."

Somewhere around 1970 a friend introduced me to the grand old Scottish game of golf. Understandably, those who have not attempted to master this game refer to it with derision as “pasture pool.” But, anyone who has attempted to attain proficiency at golf soon understands why our Scottish ancestors invented it centuries ago and have been infatuated ever since. Using fourteen different implements, traversing grass, trees, sand and water, through wind and weather, uphill and down, the sport requires a unique blend of physical and mental skills. At any rate, golf provided me with as much enjoyment as anything else in this life. Although taking up the game too late in life to become a master of the sport, insomuch as that is possible, there are three highlights that provide moments of pleasure during these endless hours of confinement and reflection. One was shooting a five under par, sixty seven, in a Pro-Am. Another was a hole-in-one on a par four. And lastly was making a birdie on a difficult eighteenth hole in a substantial money game called a Calcutta. I suppose after all these years, plus age and health problems, that I would now be a poor golfer, but occasionally I allow myself to dream of again playing the game.

"What I want to know is what a fellow does when he plays golf. Tell me in as few words as you can just what it's all about." --"You hit a ball with a stick until it falls into a hole."

In almost all other games you pit yourself against a mortal foe; in golf it is yourself against the world: no human being stays your progress as you drive your ball over the face of the globe.

Golf is more exacting than racing, cards, speculation, or matrimony.

Golf is more exacting than a a steeple-chase or the half-mile.

...golf appeals to the idiot in us, and the child. … Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five.

I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles.

Golf is such a wonderful game, I love it to death.

Golf gives no margin: either you win or you fail. You cannot hedge; you cannot bluff; you cannot give a stop-order; you cannot jilt. One chance is given you, and you hit or miss. There is nothing more rigid in life. And it is just this ultra and extreme rigidity that makes golf so intensely interesting.

Maybe you'll fail most of the time, but until you've dared to try and have brought off an impossible shot from the or from the , or have salvaged a hole by laying a monster of a shot stiff against the pin, you will have missed golf's greatest playing thrill.