إن معظم الناس مقتنعون بأنه طالما أنهم ليسوا مضطرين صراحة إلى عمل شيء بسبب قوة خارجية، فإن قراراتهم هي قراراتهم وأنهم إذا أرادوا شيئا فانهم هم الذين ي… - Erich Fromm

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إن معظم الناس مقتنعون بأنه طالما أنهم ليسوا مضطرين صراحة إلى عمل شيء بسبب قوة خارجية، فإن قراراتهم هي قراراتهم وأنهم إذا أرادوا شيئا فانهم هم الذين يريدونه. ولكن هذا هو أحد الأوهام الكبرى التي لدينا عن أنفسنا. إن عددا كبيرا من قراراتنا ليست حقا قراراتنا، بل أوحى بها لنا من الخارج، لقد نجحنا في اقناع أنفسنا بأننا نحن الذين نصنع القرار بينما نحن في الحقيقة نتطابق مع توقعات الآخرين مساقين بالخوف من العزلة وبتهديدات مباشرة أكثر إزاء حياتنا وحريتنا وراحتنا.

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About Erich Fromm

Erich Seligmann Fromm (23 March 1900 – 18 March 1980) was a German social psychologist, psychoanalyst, sociologist, humanistic philosopher, and democratic socialist. He was associated with the Frankfurt School of critical theory.

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Alternative Names: Erich Seligmann Fromm
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Most people see the problem of love primarily as that of being loved , rather than that of loving , of one's capacity to love. Hence the problem to them is how to be loved, how to be lovable. In pursuit of this aim they follow several paths. One, which is especially used by men, is to be successful, to be as powerful and rich as the social margin of one's position permits. Another, used especially by women, is to make oneself attractive, by cultivating one's body, dress, etc. .... Many of the ways to make oneself lovable are the same as those used to make oneself successful, to 'win friends and influence people'. As a matter of fact, what most people in our culture mean by being lovable is essentially a mixture between being popular and having sex appeal.

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