The first person I killed was a thirty-year-old gypsy who was dealing heroin in my neighborhood. I was fourteen, I tried to fight him and make him le… - Nicolai Lilin

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The first person I killed was a thirty-year-old gypsy who was dealing heroin in my neighborhood. I was fourteen, I tried to fight him and make him leave, but he beat me up. So I went to my grandfather and told him everything; he loaded a revolver, gave it to me and told me to shoot him in the knees. I shot him in the knees with the first shot but the second one went wrong and I hit his liver and he died. It was a war and my father did much worse. He was one of those who carried out reprisals, he suffered three very serious attacks, in one of them I was also in the car when they shot at us. A real war. Then my father had to leave the country because the war was lost. Corruption and the power of traffickers and drugs won. In fact he joined the police, politics, corrupt power and our country was occupied by these people. My mother, finding herself in this situation, married to a man who for years had opposed this system, had to flee because too often corrupt policemen came to search and threaten us, to know where my father was hiding, where his money was. I myself was taken into the woods several times, they pointed a gun at my head to try to get information. Then I also went away and had my experiences.