In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was Gotcha! - Attila the Stockbroker

No agony, no ecstacy, no pleasure and no pain —
so exquisitely uninteresting you drive your wife insane
The TV is your oracle, the newspapers your guide
and your shiny little vehicle is your passion and your pride
You've done the same things every day for nigh on forty years
and in your ludicrous routines you hide your worthless fears
On the blandest boat in Boredom you are captain of the crew
and every time I eat vegetables it makes me think of you.

I am one of a team
of Iraqi weapons inspectors
currently travelling through the United Kingdom
under very difficult conditions
searching for weapons of mass distraction.

For what fortress, what city, in the wide extent of the Roman empire, can hope to exist, secure and impregnable, if it is our pleasure that it should be erased from the earth?