It really hasn't hit me that I am about to die. I see the grief around me, but inside I feel serene and a certain kind of peace. My whole life I've w… - Lou Sullivan

"He said my ambiguity was one of the few things that made me "interesting." Afterwards I cried while talking with Charles about it, saying I don't want to be interesting, I want to be happy."

I challenge any person who will not admit this in themselves, such as “the woman who relies on a closet full of funny, expensive clothing or makeup and lacquered hairdos”, because I could never be that...that which I was supposed to be...and I refuse to be identified with a woman like that. I CAN’T BE! My older sister is inferior to a transvestite becuz she can’t relax, she’s trying so hard to deny her inner humanity and free-ness, to bottle up any susceptibility to feelings—while a transvestite at the very least, admits to himself his inner life and feelings, and, at the most, if he comes out, he’s left wide open for rejection by family and friends, physical harm, denial of use of public and private facilities, easy prey for others to try and fuck his head over by saying he’s sick, etc.,—all for the sake of relaxing with themselves, being free and open and alive. You ask him to come alive to the world so the world can kill him.

You told me I couldn't live as a gay man, but now I am going to die as one.