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I have taken precautions about losing the front door-key. I have it tied around my waist underneath my singlet. It means getting partly undressed eac… - Lennie Lower
" "I have taken precautions about losing the front door-key. I have it tied around my waist underneath my singlet. It means getting partly undressed each time I want to open the door but it's better than sitting on the door-step all night. Or is it?
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About Lennie Lower
Leonard "Lennie" Waldemere Lower (24 September 1903 – 19 July 1947) was an Australian humourist who is still considered by many to be the comic genius of Australian journalism. Lower's drinking was "legendary", hence the titles of his two best-known books: "Here's luck!" is a well-known Australian drinking toast, as is "Here's another!"
Also Known As
Alternative Names:
Leonard Waldermar Lower
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Additional quotes by Lennie Lower
Don't be misled by weighing machines. Weighing machines are the most lying things on earth, and should be treated accordingly. When you see "16 st. 10 lb." on the dial, think of the number you first thought of and stick to it. And don't be disheartened if results do not come immediately. Slim women may look slick, but a fat woman stays. Ask any corset manufacturer.
Many people are confused by the multiplicity of knives, forks, and spoons set before them, and are inclined to make a haphazard selection, thus making goats of themselves. Remain calm and do the thing systematically. First of all, use up the spoons; secondly, go through the forks; then wind up on the knives. In the case of wine glasses and so forth, select the biggest and stick to it. I do this myself invariably, and have never been tossed out of a dining-room yet.
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That's the worst of these New Year resolutions-they get you into so much trouble. I think it is much safer to give some harmless order to yourself, such as resolving not to drink out of horse-troughs on Sunday. But I wasn't satisfied with something simple like that. I made a grand, sweeping gesture and resolved to be a model husband. And the result: The resolution split up the sides the first day.
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